I always thought that if you had PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - that then you were more likely to get some form of dementia. I learned recently that if you have a form of dementia then it will bring out the PTSD because they are reverting back to past memories that they had suppressed when the incident(s) happened. My DH is a veteran and it now makes alot of sense when I look at it from that angle.
I don't know if you saw it, but there is a discussion titled PTSD and AD. You can find it by putting the title into the "search" at the top of this page. There are a lot of posts under it that you may find interesting to read. I didn't check to see if anything similar to your comment was in there.
You know, Kitty, I often wonder how we can ever get our life turned around after this is all over. Things are just not "going to go away". We are getting older and it is hard to make changes. I do not have very many "friends" other than our children. It has been so long since I have visited, gone to lunch or shopping with another female now at age 70 or whenever, can I pick up myself and make new associations?
Before AD we owned our own small business and worked all the time and had little time to do things outside of work. I think sometimes I would love to be able to work a few hours a week in a hardware store stocking shelves etc.
Is there a food pantry near you? THAT takes a lot of shelf stacking...! And they always need help.
I don't know whether you live in a town large enough to have volunteer oppportunities (maybe in a church but also in any number of other venues) but I find it immensely satisfying to do my weekly zoo-docent duties, and to work on the education committee of our local land trust. And through the latter I've made two close friends who are my age almost exactly, just within the last couple of years. And at the zoo people are mostly retired; a few years ago I went to Peru with four others from the zoo, both older and younger than I, and we're still very close. I forget, do you have any relief time, or any way to get relief? The idea of a few hours away is NOT because you have stuff you're required to do, but because you need a bit of time OFF.
Thanks for the ideas briegull. Right now I have 4 hours once a week. But, it has been so long since I have had time off that I just want to be alone for a few hours. I have already thought of a couple of places I would like to volunteer, so that may be the answer --later---
Imohr, allow yourself to have those few hours alone as long as you need them.. Like you I have always needed alone time. So far when the neighborhood group takes my husband away for an outing I've spent it alone doing something nice for me.
Next week I'll be going to a community Ladies Lunch and he also will go out to lunch. It is the first time I've used my time off to be with other people.
But guys, you don't get to watch elephants exploring a new exhibit and trying to escape!! Or the moon bears arranging themselves so they look like they're in recliners watching TV!! I'm an only child and have always, always valued my alone time - but sometimes that means "time to think" and sometimes thinking is the last thing in the world I want to do!!
I wasn't an only child. I was a caboose. My brother was 13 years older than me, and my sister was 11 years older. Basically I had an extra set of totally off the wall and incompetent parents. When I was 8 years old they married a month apart and I was suddenly the only child in the house.
I always said I had all of the disadvantages of being an only child (being alone, and no one to play with) and none of the advantages (no one was going to spoil me).
I'll be darned Starling, I was also the caboose. My sisters were 8 & 12 yrs older, married w/children while I was still in grade school I became an aunt when I was barely 7. I was alone a lot and used to think, "I wish I had a sister' then I'd remember--oh, I do, but we were in different worlds. As I had my children and aged, the difference in yrs seemed not so evident and we were pretty close. But I am a loner, almost reclusive and very reflective, think too much--always have. I was definitely raised as an only child, but all in all, I had a very happy childhood, no complaints.
My first nephew was born just before my 10th birthday. That sister who was 12 years older than you HAD to have had that baby unusually early. <grin> But like you, they really were in a totally different world.
And then there was the whole being allowed to grow up thing. I literally had one of those conversations with my sister when I was in my mid-50s. I described myself as middle-aged and she couldn't deal with it. Believe me, calling oneself middle aged at 55 isn't exactly weird. There was the whole bit of them being older and wiser, except they weren't all that much wiser, which continued too far into my adult years and drove me crazy as a teenager. I literally had a teacher tell me I didn't need to listen to them when I was 17 because they were so out of line.
I had a very difficult childhood with way too much responsibility way too early. I also went to schools run by crazy people until I got to High School. My grammar school principal had Alzheimer's and had probably had it for a decade by the time I was in 6th grade. My Jr. High principal was abusive and had the reputation for being abusive and out of line from the early 40s when he went after my older brother to the middle 60s when I heard an equally weird story about him when I was in the local library. I THINK I saw him at graduation, but can't be sure because I had never seen the man before.
The Chancellor of CCNY was equally invisible, which I realize now is totally weird. The only normal one in the bunch was my High School Principal who literally did the walk the halls thing on a regular basis and knew every kid in the school including me. It wasn't until my daughter was in school in places other than New York City that I recognized just how weird my school experience had been.