ON Wed. the Alternate care facility called me to say they were sending my hubby to the psychiatric ward at a nearby hospital for evaluation and adjustment of meds. I have visited every evening since and all they seem to be doing is giving him very strong sedatives...tonight I think he didn't even know me. I have tried to get some info from his nurses..but have not been able to get in touch with the Dr. assigned. We didn't have a Dr. at this facility as I recently had to move him into this locked unit. They claimed that he threatened suicide which is why they moved him to the hospital. He has said that to me different times when he became very angry, but it was always kind of a rant..."I might as well get a gun and shoot myself". I felt he was just venting and trying to make me give in and let him drive or whatever he was angry about at the time. He never even made a move to try anything. I think he was just too difficult for them to care for and they wanted a quiet, docile little old man. What are my alternatives here? Does anyone know?
I am so sorry that this has happened. I wish I had some advice for you, but wanted you to know that I care and will be thinking of you - praying for a resolution for your husband.
Dewdrop I have been where you are. My husband was turned into a drooling zombie. On the plus side at least the dementia facility may take him back. Hopefully you can work with your own doctor and ease up on the meds once he settles in again. I found the psyche units are clueless in dealing with dementia.
Bluedaze...did anything change for your husband after that or did (or does) he continue to be that way? My hubby was not yet incontinent before entering the psych unit, but the nurse told me he now is and even tried to tell me that he was before entering there. I have care for him at home for 4 and a half years..except for daycare when I was working, and I know he wasn't. When I ask about him maybe being overmedicated, they kind of make me sound like I'm in denial and this is the only alternative. I know he will never "come back" though I still pray for that..and seeing him like this is like the end of the world.
I am so sorry for all of you who have to go through this terrible disease. It's definitely the worst kind of loss and I can speak from experience there. Thanks for the thoughts and support.
My DH hasn't (yet) had to go for psych evaluations or treatment, but I've already decided if he ever does I'd have him transferred to a uunit that's almost an hour south of us. Reason is, not all psych units in hospitals have the right staff doctors who specialize in the dementia related behaviors. Our local hospital is just a basic psych unit.
I do understand that sometimes it is necessary for patients to be "heavily" medicated initially. Then doctors ideally should team conference with staff and family as they approach a med plan and start backing off the hard stuff. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention too that I've heard your same type complaints on the forums. True, some patients do not return to the baseline they were at prior to getting heavily drugged up.
I guess one thing to consider is this.....Which is the lesser of two evils? Was your DH so miserable from a tormented mind that he truly was suffering? Perhaps he was in so much anguish that this period he's going through is necessary, and hopefully only for a short while.
I agree with New Realm. This horrible disease is going to progress even through our best efforts at caregiving. The lesser of two evils is definitely a point to consider. I for one do not want my DH to be tormented nor do I want him so drugged he can't function. (I really want him back the way he was before this, but that is not a reality). Certain stresses do bring a decline and hopefully they can regain some things that were lost. I believe it is a process to find the right meds for the patient and sometimes it is very hard to experience this with them. I still hold out hope that there is something that will help both of our husbands be more at peace and less restless. I will be praying that they do find something soon for both of our husbands.
I think it is completely and totally unacceptable and inexcusable that the psych doctor has not spoken with Dewdrop.
Find out who is the head of the psychiatric unit -- Chief of the Neurology Service or whatever -- and ask to speak with him. Be courteous, but make it clear that you have very serious concerns about your husband's treatment -- and about the way the staff have been treating you. If he is not available right then, ask when he will be available, make it very clear that you expect him to call at that time, or see if you can get an appointment right away. Be sure get the name of the person with whom you are speaking.
If that person says you can't get through to him in person or by phone in a reasonable amount of time, then ask for a fax number and fax him a letter making it clear -- politely but firmly -- that you have repeatedly attempted to contact the doctor without success, that you believe there was no reason to send your husband there in the first place, that you are extremely disturbed about this high-handed behavior, that you believe he is being given inappropriate treatment, and that you want answers. Give him the name of the person with whom you left a message for him to call you. Tell him you will also be sending the letter by certified mail (and do it.)
Contact your husband's regular doctor. Ask him to intervene. Ask him whether he can, bare minimum, have your husband transferred to a psych unit where he or one of his trusted colleagues has privileges.
I have seen references to "ombudsmen" on "the other site". I will check more into that.
"The Ombudsman program is the office to which you make complaints to when there has been a concern or incident in a facility. They investigate, take a report, and try to get action regarding the concern/issue. They also keep track of all complaints and they report to the state regulatory agency any severe incident as well as a pattern of incidents in a facility.
"Each facility MUST by law have the Ombudsman telephone number posted so it is easily seen. This is true in every state. You also should have received the telephone number of Ombudsman in your husband's admission papers."
I did a little quick googling, and it appears that both the the psychiatric ward and the AD facility should have an ombudsman posted. It isn't totally clear to me whether there is a single ombudsman office that handles concerns about both types of facilities, however.
So when you call to speak with the Chief of Neurology or whoever is in charge, also ask for the phone number of the ombudsman. (That should encourage them to deal with you directly, and promptly.)
Call the AD facility and ask them for the name and phone number of their ombudsman.
to find the Ombudsman Office for your state. I arbitrarily picked the office for Minnesota. It says:
The Ombudsman for Mental Health and Developmental Disabilities assists with the following:
* concerns or complaints about services, * questions about rights, * grievances, * access to appropriate services, * ideas for making services better; and * general questions or the need for information concerning services for persons with mental disabilities.
It's likely that each facility has their own Ombudsman. I found it most effective to ask when the Dr. does rounds, mand then tell them you'll be there. Then do it. It wasn't convenient for me, but I was there at 6:30 and caught his Dr. at 7. Cleared up a couple things and let him know I expected information as available, a consultation if I requested it and that I wasn't very happy with the way I'd been ignored thus far. When he and the Case Manager realized I wasn't going to just sit back and wait for them to "get back to me", things changed. It wasn't ideal, but it was better.