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    •  
      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeSep 6th 2018
     
    If I remember correctly, you go to account, edit profile and put the star there. Just remember when you go to sign in to put the star there too or it won't let you log in. If you know how, make a heart instead.
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeSep 6th 2018
     
    Thanks Charlotte. It let me do that and left me signed in.
  1.  
    It's odd how--no matter how bad they are, and no matter how you know the end is coming, and no matter how there is no quality to your life or theirs either, and you can't stand one more minute...and yet...and yet...when they die it is like the world stopped spinning for a minute and then re-started...rotating on a different axis. The world becomes so different--and so do you.
    • CommentAuthorCO2*
    • CommentTimeSep 8th 2018
     
    Elizabeth always says it so well. We do become different people. I am in the process of learning who,I am now. It is as if my life started all over again.
    • CommentAuthorDRA
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2018
     
    I really don't know who I am right now. It has been since June 27th and some days I think I can do this and move on and other days I feel as lost as I did when it happened, I feel like I am so weak. Everyone tells me I knew you could handle this so I must be a pretty good actor. If trying not to think of him is doing good, then I guess I am. But if I let myself remember him, imagine him standing in the room, I lose it. I can't go to the cemetery and that is mostly because I know he really isn't there. It has been Dave and Sandy since I was 16 years old and now I'm 69 and don't really know. I am just so sad. I know that our journey with Alzheimer was relatively short (diagnosed 2 years ago), but had some issues and after reading how long the suffering goes on for most people, they tell me I was lucky.
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      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2018
     
    None of us are lucky whether it be 2 years or 20 years - it is all horrible and heartbreaking. I hate hearing 'you are strong', 'you can handle this', etc. Grieving is a process that takes more than a few weeks. For some it can be years.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2018 edited
     
    Sandy, it's early days yet, and what you're feeling is normal. I think you're still probably in shock, and as that wears off, you'll find yourself dealing with a new realty. It takes time — lots and lots of time — and it goes at its own pace. Eventually you will come to terms with it. Try to be patient and kind to yourself in the mean time.
    • CommentAuthorDRA
    • CommentTimeSep 11th 2018
     
    Thanks for your responses. I guess I always thought of myself as someone who could handle things. But losing my mom and dad did not prepare me for losing Dave. I will try to remember that it does take time and I look forward to the day I can remember the good times and the love we shared.
    • CommentAuthorlindyloo*
    • CommentTimeSep 11th 2018
     
    Those times do come, DRA, the positive memories. But we have to get through the waves of grief that can toss around some. Tsunamis can knock down even the strong. Will carry you in my thoughts and prayers.
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2018
     
    I thought I had been grieving for so long that this would be a relief. But that grief during the alzheimer journey was for something completely different.
    There is certainly a component of relief. I am beginning to enjoy my property again. September was always my favorite month. Now I go outside when I want to do yard work, not as an escape from someone trying to attack me. No one comes sneaking up behind me. I am beginning to drop the hypervigilance.
    Going through the pictures. Researching his military medals and summarizing his career for his sister. Remembering camping trips with him and his boys. Remembering watching him fly and watching him teach the young ones. Seeing how they came from all.around the country to say farewell to their instructor, mentor, friend. It all looks different from here. DURING ...you lose little bits at a time . Now, seeing the before and after superimposed, if you will, is a completely different thing. I feel so ROBBED. He was so ROBBED.
  2.  
    bhv* - it sounds as if his sons were kind and decent. They will surely want the military mementos as well.
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeSep 16th 2018
     
    His sons were kind and decent. They soaked up every story. I sent them home with many mementos.

    I just came in from working in the ravine in my new desert tactical boots! WOW. Now that's what I've been looking for. They are as comfy as sneakers but support my whole foot and ankles when I am on the hillside. I love them!
  3.  
    Gosh, I haven't posted for ages, but continue to appreciate your advice. Is anyone still fighting the big corporations for benefits? Does this ever end?

    Ann
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeOct 1st 2018 edited
     
    Ann, it's good to hear from you again. How are you doing? Please let us know.
  4.  
    Hi Mary!

    I miss all of you! I wish I could say that everything is going well, but in some ways....it is more difficult! How does that make sense?
  5.  
    I still come here to try to catch up on all of you, you, my friends who loved and supported ,me all those terrible yearsof caring for Stu until he died on my birthday in 2013, and you still supported me when I had to sell my home in Ky and I moved to FL. As some of you know, I moved to a very small town, met a wonderful man, and re married in June of 2016. This past Sept. we found he had severe Arterial Stenosis and the same cardioligist team who saved my life after a heart attack and stroke in 2015, replaced the arterial valve ITAVR) in an 8 hour surgery, in hospital 60 miles from our home. I stayed with him in hospital for 9 days, then we came home. He wasd progressing well, then we met Michael, the hurricane, which destroyed almost everything we had and devastated this sdmall town in the FL Panhandle.He did more than he dhould have and began to fail. We were without power and water, lived with a generator, for two weeks before we took him back to hospital in Tallahassee, where they found the valve was leaking, so another 8 hour surgery to plug the valve. He did not recover from that well and begsan to go downhill, kidneys failing, fluid build up in heart and lungs . Meanwhile I was driving back and forth to home to arrange for clean up. We were still without power or water. Was in the hospital for 20 days before moving him to nursing home 40 miles from our home. Most beds had been taken for hurricane victims so "no room in the inn" John died Nov. 10th, 6 days later. He said he loved me and wanted to stay with me, but had to go on this trip alone, he just couldn't fight anymore. Meanwhile I am still dealing with the cleanup, the windows and door replacement, trees being hauled off, all my appliances went out, after we got power back. Just got my landline phone and internet back 2 days ago, still no TV. Cell phone does not work most of the time. I am thakful the house wsd not totally destroyed as most were. People are living in tents. I am fortunate to have a warm home, enough food, money to buy the things I need, but most services and stores are not up and running yet. This little town will never be the same nor will the people. Some of you are friends on FB and know my story, but just wanted to touch base with all of you. I don't know what I would have done without Joan's place all those years. I think of you and read your posts and am sending that rope with another knot in it, for you to hang on to.
  6.  
    Oh my God, Vickie, I am so sorry for all you have been going through--the loss of your husband and the hurricane both--there are just no words. And it's the Holidays, on top of everything else. All I can say is I'm tossing you the knotted rope, too. I think you need it as much as anybody here at Joan's. Arms around.
    • CommentAuthorNicky
    • CommentTimeDec 5th 2018
     
    OMG, Vickie, I'm so very sorry for everything that has happened. Like Elizabeth said, 'there are no words'. You're in my prayers (((hugs))).
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeDec 5th 2018
     
    It's always good to hear from you, dear Vickie, even though your news is shocking. I'm sorry you are still having to go through the cleanup, especially after the loss of your beloved husband. You are in my prayers. If I remember correctly, you had moved to Florida to be close to your sister. How is she?
    •  
      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeDec 5th 2018
     
    Sorry to hear about your husband's death Vickie. I know when you moved there you were not looking for another marriage but he won your heart. May you have peace and strength as you recover from another painful loss and recover from the hurricane.
    • CommentAuthoroakridge
    • CommentTimeDec 5th 2018
     
    Oh Vicki. how heartbreaking this must have been to lose two husbands. My sister lives in FL so familiar with Michael and all his relatives. I've not been on the list long enough to have known you, but do know you must be a very strong person to continue on with your life, in spite of what you've had to face. Keep sending that line with a knot in it, I'm already reaching out for it!
    • CommentAuthormyrtle*
    • CommentTimeJan 14th 2019
     
    Vickie*, I did not see this when you posted it. I remember when your husband helped you through your own grave illness after you moved to Florida. You have been through a lot. I am so sorry.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle*
    • CommentTimeJan 14th 2019
     
    I am so furious. My husband died almost two years ago. I just got an email from one of my stepdaughters (who lives on the other side of the country), asking if I could send her an antique pocket watch that belonged to his grandfather. She did not know of its existence until she saw it here on her last visit to him. When she asked about it, I said that I enjoyed having it (we always displayed in a glass dome) but that eventually I would like it to go to his family, not to mine. She now says I promised it to her (which I didn't - she has three siblings and they all have kids) and she would like to enjoy it now. BTW, I have not heard one word from her for about 8 months, even though I have send regular gifts to her 3 grandchildren during that time.
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      CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeJan 14th 2019
     
    myrtle - if someone on his side of the family, then give it to them. Or put their name on to go to a particular person when you die.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeJan 15th 2019
     
    I know exactly the emotions you are going through, having experienced them with my husband’s children.
    I guess the least contentious thing would be to say that you want to continue to enjoy the watch yourself while you are alive, but that it would be left to a member of your former husband’s family, as you had stated, in your will.
    I hope her children are thanking you for your gifts, or that she is. If not, I wouldn’t send any more.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle*
    • CommentTimeJan 19th 2019 edited
     
    Thanks for your comments. One of her children thanks me regularly for the gifts. The other hasn't, although they did send me a Christmas card. I'm going to email her that I'm going to hang on to the watch for the time being. I really don't need the damn thing, so if I can get over my anger at her grasping, I'll send it to her, but otherwise she'll have to wait. Although she has been helpful in many ways, she is very "high maintenance" and it seems she always does something to ruin things. Once when she was coming to visit, she made so many demands that I had to stop my husband from calling her and telling her not to come because she was disturbing his happy home.
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019
     
    Ok I’m in trouble here. Did not know where to turn. It hurts so bad. There’s no word to describe this.. I don’t know where to turn. I can’t even breathe. What am I supposed to do with this pain? I have no idea where turn. I can’t breathe.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019
     
    Bonnie, lie down. Breathe by pushing out your belly button. Try to stay lying down for about 20 minutes.
    This too will pass. You have to be patient with yourself.
    Arms around, warm prayers, and much love.
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019 edited
     
    It has been almost four months now since my DW passed on to a better place. the final week was hard. She went in to a deep sleep or a coma on a Monday and stayed that way until she died the falling Salutary. on Monday, through Thursday, she, while asleep kept trying to get up. it was a battle. The Saturday and Sunday before deep sleep she had fell 3 or 4 hard times. her face was seriousely black and blue, the back of her head was bandaged, both arms were wrapped up as her skin was storn. she looked like she had been in a bad fight and lost or a car wreck.

    on Sunday, the day before deep sleep, my Son and 10 year old grandson came to visit her. Durning the vist she mostly mumbled. But, at a point just before end of visit she got my son to look straight at her and she said "I got Jesus, I am ready to go", Those were her final words. Next day went into thar sleep/coma.

    What does that say about the demented mind?

    The time after her passing was hard. The hospice nurse called the funeral home. It was Saturday 3:10pm. As it would happen in our small area just before DW passed, 3other people passed or were killed. Needless to say th funeral guy was over loaded as two bodies were out of town 10-15 miles away.
    as a result my two daughters and I set with DW for 3 and a half hours after she passed. I got a good picture of what death looked like. I had to keep that father's brave face for my girls. Hard to do for all that time.
    Everything else. went fine. My. kids did all the work. I just wrote checks. I flew my grand children and Son's in Laws in plus one great grand daughter.

    The first two months afterwards I was still kind of numb. Then I Started to become more emotional. My room is filled with her paintings and memorabilia. I am now starting to feel like a single adult. After a teenage marriage that lasted 56 years that being single is a hard thing to realize.

    That's my recent story as to what happened. Hang on bhv
    rodstar43*
    Richard
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019
     
    Its been so long that I forgot how to post. i did the previos on by accident. donot know what I did.

    help
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019
     
    thi k i got that how do u copy?
    • CommentAuthorRodstar43*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019
     
    what's up bhv
    email me
    rodstar
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeJan 24th 2019 edited
     
    Thanks Mary75 and Rodstar.
    I’m a little better. Breathing anyway. Ate something. Watching some tv stuff to escape, but everything seems to be making me sad. I keep hearing that song “How am I supposed to live without you.” At the same time as knowing it was impossible to live with him. I keep hyperventilating. I keep drinking too much. And sleeping too much. But right now can’t go to sleep. It’s winter and cold and he would wrap me in his arms and say I’ll warm you up. And now there’s no one.....
    • CommentAuthorlindyloo*
    • CommentTimeJan 25th 2019
     
    Bonnie, I called these waves tsunamis for a reason. There is little to do but let the wave crash and then recede. And know, unfortunately, that there will be another one along shortly. I had naively thought I I was doing all my grieving during the dying process. Wrong. Sleep is not a bad thing during the wave. And when it passes you get up and do stuff. I really can't remember the stuff I did. But after the first several months, I began doing what I called throwing an anchor into the future and pulling myself along the anchor rope into that future. I think it was you who explained the imagery to this website. I did that by making commitments, small at first, that were hard to break. A lunch date. Some folks over for a meal. Family for Thanksgiving and then Christmas. A trip to visit my son for a weekend. First very small things. Things it would be hard to back out of. You can't do any of that in the midst of the tsunami of course. But in between.......I tried for little steps before I tackled the larger ones.

    I'm glad that Mary knows what to do about hyperventilation. Me I wailed. Glad that there was no one to hear me.
  7.  
    Hang in there bhv. This is what it does--you'll be fine for a while and then it hits you again--sometimes just out of nowhere. Listen to Mary and Linda. And know that it does not last forever. Arms around.

    Good to hear from you again, Rodstar You have sure been through the mill. Arms around you, too.
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeJan 25th 2019
     
    Well the sun is out this morning. Shocking as that seemed to me anyway. I had kind of got used to the tsunamis. Last night I couldnt find the anchor. But it wouldn’t have helped because last night was not just a tsunami ... it was a rogue wave out of nowhere. I did some wailing yesterday too. I’ve never experienced that either. Good no one here, otherwise I d have held all that in and who knows how much damage that might have done.

    Before the rogue, I had made a lunch date for today. Almost cancelled, but I think I will go and see what happens.

    Also before the rogue I wrote to Jim’s oldest son cause I was thinking of him on the golf course on Wed. I said if he ever wanted to come here they could stay here and we could play together. I didn’t really think they would, but he seems to want to keep in contact. This morning he said he and his wife had actually talked about returning on several occasions. So it wasn’t my imagination that we seemed to fit well together and enjoyed each other’s company.

    Better today and thankful for you all. It was scary being alone last night. And then I realized I am not alone.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeJan 25th 2019
     
    Wailing is good. So are tears. They relieve the tension.
    I'm glad today is a better day for you. I hope you went to lunch and enjoyed it.
    I like the idea of golf, too.
    • CommentAuthorMitsou*
    • CommentTimeFeb 7th 2019
     
    Just needed to talk to someone. My DH passed away now 3 ½ months ago. I have tried to stay busy and not to think too much. Last week-end would have been his birthday. Since then I have done hardly anything, not gone outside until this afternoon for a bit of a walk. I came back and sat on the front porch, it was windy. I remembered that he had given me a wind chime a few years ago. It was still in the box. There was a nail on the side of the ceiling above the porch but it was too high. I went back inside and got the step ladder. I had to go up to the top step of the ladder but it was hard to reach the nail. With my recent two knee operation it was difficult to stay stable on the ladder and I had nothing to hold on to. Several people walked on the sidewalk in front of my house and said “hi” then kept walking. I tried several times to place the hook on the wind chime to the nail. My neighbor drove in into our shared driveway. She came out and said hi then went inside to get her dog for a walk. Me still on the step ladder trying to get that wind chime on the nail and almost falling several times. I finally did it. But then I went inside and felt terrible. No one would help me. I am all alone. Even with his AD my DH still could help me a bit. He had the disease 10 years but almost to the end he still could do things like this. I came in and cried and cried. I know no one in this town. I have not talked to a human in 10 days, just talked to my cats. I don’t think those people are mean, they just don’t pay attention, and don’t care. I had been doing not too bad, but now I keep crying. So I thought to come and write and it might be better. You don’t have to answer me – I just needed to share this, that’s all.
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeFeb 7th 2019 edited
     
    I know the feeling.
    I don’t know that I’ve reached any helpful conclusion about it all. People are busy. It’s a complex society.
    Then there are other days when the whole world world seems a friendly, kind and helpful place.
    Just wanted you to know you’re not alone, Mitsou.
  8.  
    I was just thinking that I know the feeling too, Mitsou. You can go along and be just fine and feel like you're coping well, and then for some reason it just hits you that people are not necessarily available to help you when you need it...you realize that the people who were there for you in the old days--family members, our spouses--are just not there anymore...there is just nobody around who "has your back." It is a very sad and a very frightening feeling. I've had it come out of nowhere a couple times, and have found it difficult to deal with. Most recently, it has been in trying to have somebody drive me to a very routine but necessary medical screening...okay, maybe too much information...but I need to get a baseline colonoscopy, and of course they won't let you drive yourself. I have arranged with a friend from church to drive me, but she is quite elderly and won't do it if there are two flakes of snow out there. So I've had to cancel twice, and it just hit home to me that in time of real need, I don't have much of a support network. But as Mary said, there are other times when the world seems much warmer and kinder. Sadness can suddenly come out of nowhere, but so can bright, happy moments. (I've re-scheduled the colonoscopy for late March, and one of my neighbors has said she'll be the back-up driver for me in case my elderly church friend bails out again.)

    I've gotten out of the wrong side of the bed a couple times and really had the blues and kind of a free-floating anxious feeling--unusual for me, thank goodness, but it does occasionally happen. I tend to over-eat at those times--either mass quantities of chips and dip or Haagen Das Vanilla Bean ice cream with our store brand bourbon butterscotch sauce...no, I'm not recommending that strategy...just saying that I've been known to use food for emotional anesthesia. I have tried to get a hold--to sit down and think of some good strategies to deal with the feelings of isolation and lack of support. First of all, I do have to be realistic--mostly all of the relatives who loved me and cared for me are dead. The relatives I have left don't care--they are barely wedding and funeral family, and I cannot expect concrete help from them for anything. My daughters are really not available to help me with anything either. So I think my goal should be to try very hard to take care of myself in terms of having a well-maintained and safe apartment and car, and not to engage in any risky behaviors--for instance, I try not to drive if the roads are snow-covered and slippery, even though I have AWD and good snow tires. I am trying to do all the baseline health care screenings that we are all supposed to do, and am not just blowing them off anymore. I am looking into a social self-help group in our town (there are several around the region) called S.S.I.P. Settled and Serving in Place. It meets once a week at a nearby diner, and is meant to be for people who want to age in place in their own homes--apparently they help each other do that. So I'll see how that goes. I'm also trying to reach out a bit more and be the friend I'd like to have...so this week I called a neighbor friend and asked her over to my place for morning coffee and my home made shortbread. We drank a pot of coffee and chatted for an hour and a half--I really need to do more of that kind of thing instead of just holing up, feeding my face, and moping. I try to build up my own personal emotional strength by prayer and meditation morning and evening. For me, it's Lauds and Vespers--yeah, right, like I'm a Benedictine--but the prayer and quiet time really bookends my day and gives comfort and structure. There is a non-religious meditation that I like to think about daily: "This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever. In its place is something you have left behind--let it be something good."
    • CommentAuthorbhv*
    • CommentTimeFeb 10th 2019
     
    Hi Mitsou. I was just thinking about you the other day. Shortly after I moved out to the country I broke my ankle. Just after my pilot husband left for two weeks. He came home to get me out of the hospital and we figured out ways for me to handle caring for myself and our dog before he left again. I was on crutches and a large, heavy package was delivered to my driveway. I couldn’t believe how many cars drove by as I was out there trying to figure how to get that thing into the house. I was pushing it a few inches at a time up the hill when, finally a workman stopped and brought it into my garage. I lived here for about 8 years before being invited to the neighborhood group of ladies who are my lifeline now.

    Like Elizabeth and Lindylou I am pushing myself out of my comfort zone and planning outings like lunch and movies with a couple of the gals. They love to come but hate to do the planning and coordinating.

    Yesterday I was proud of myself for going out in the rain to a “Successful Aging Expo”. Gathered a bunch of info. Unlike my normal or previous self, I joined in a chair yoga demo. Better workout than expected. Then I watched line dancing for awhile and actually joined in on that too. Wow. It was so much fun! Two gals helped me learn two of the dances and were very friendly. I think I am going to go to the Senior Center and try that out.

    Mitsou, I highly recommend you check out a senior center as a way to find friends or just be around people once in awhile. The line dancing was great exercise, fun, and social without expectations. After my experience in this neighborhood I am not too trusting though. I will go slow and if someone wants to be friends I would meet in neutral territory like for coffee or lunch rather than my house. Because there ARE psychos out there. Also a lot of clingy needy people. I have my sister and her daughter to fill that role in my life, thank you very much.
    • CommentAuthormyrtle*
    • CommentTimeFeb 10th 2019 edited
     
    bhv*, Good suggestion about the Senior Center. Mitsou, for the sake of your own survival, you need to get to know some local people. Don't fuss (as they say in the South!) about not being interested in the activities the Senior Center offers. Just grit your teeth and pick something that is likely to expose you to other people. And keep going. You'll still have the grief but that's another story.

    BTW, I'm glad you have cats to talk to. I was wondering which language they use when they respond to you? (Just kidding!)
    • CommentAuthorCarolVT
    • CommentTimeFeb 11th 2019
     
    The thing about Senior Centers is that the connections are cumulative. You have the opportunity to see the same people in different places at different times and gradually conversations start around that as you have something to talk about and then conversations expand. While you may not find a new true friend (or you might), at least you do have acquaintances in various degrees of closeness. You will recognize people and they will recognize you even if you don't know much about one another. It takes time and repetition.
    • CommentAuthorMitsou*
    • CommentTimeFeb 11th 2019
     
    Thank you all for your answers. I’ll check to see where there is a senior center not too far from me as that is a good suggestion. In France my mother went to a “widows and widowers club.” There were widows and widowers of all ages with many volunteers. I checked and they have them in France in most cities – usually part of the cities’ programs in addition to the regular “senior centers.” They say to go to these clubs so not to be isolated after the death of a partner. They offer regular meetings for interaction, talks, walks, etc. They help with taxes, lodging upkeep, go to movies, luncheons, theatres, organize trips and so forth. I checked to see if there are programs like this in the US – I did find just one, and in Toronto, Canada! The nice thing with these is that there are people of all ages, not just seniors, and many professional volunteers to help with a variety of tasks. I found bunches of “grief counseling” in the US, with many paying counselors as well, and here in Nashville they are all happening in churches (I don’t go to church.) But, as an Alzheimer’s widow I don’t need that type of grief support anyway you know as I have been grieving for years – it’s not the same as someone whose partners just passed suddenly from a car accident or cancer. I searched for Alzheimer’s widow’ grief support but found nothing, at least not in Nashville. But I am better now anyway.

    And as they say, there is always something … We have a sum pump in the basement and I thought it worked. It rained a lot last week so I decided to have a look (I don’t go there often on account of my recent knee replacements.) It was flooded, at least 8 inches or more. I finally, with the help of a broom, got the pump to start, but then realized that it had turned off the water heater pilot light. I tried to start it – no luck, so no hot water since last Thursday. A plumber is coming tomorrow afternoon. I have to search now for a basement waterproofing firm. In addition, the batteries on the heating thermostats went dead. Could not move the covers, so can’t change the batteries. Then I have to return to the old house, 5 hours away, for more cleaning – they are coming there to put dry wall where there was a roof leak. So, you see all this will keep me busy, and I can’t right now look for a senior center until all this work is done. But I shall. Thanks.
    • CommentAuthoroakridge
    • CommentTimeFeb 11th 2019
     
    We have a local senior center about 8 miles for us, DH would not and will not go there. Doesn't want to be around old people, if he wants to go eat he'll go to a restaurant :) I was hoping to get him to go for the foot clinics, we do not want a repeat of the last months -- but he is adamant. No senior center.
    • CommentAuthorCarolVT
    • CommentTimeFeb 12th 2019
     
    Oakridge, you might try the senior center yourself. Our local Community Senior Center has activities throughout three adjacent towns. Check out cscvt.org to see what I'm talking about. It isn't only 'sit around and have cookies' although that is included. My husband isn't interested any longer, but I have found a couple of activities that get me out and among people a couple of times a month. Reading Plays Aloud is my thing, and I like the travel and birding lectures too.
    • CommentAuthoroakridge
    • CommentTimeFeb 12th 2019
     
    Hi Carol, I don't think they even have cookies, LOL. They do serve lunch every day for $3.50 and have Bingo and cards on some days. Most of it is health checks, some exercise - they have a small exercise room.

    The ones in town had lots of classes, craft lessons, a number of things I could enjoy. Out here i think we're too small to have many activities. I should probably offer to teach a class. The Botanical Garden in town has lots of activities and we used to take part in a lot of them, as well as just going over to walk and check out different plants. It isn't that 25 miles is a major distance just seems a lot harder to make plans and carry through these days. I don't like to drive at night any more than necessary and especially not in traffic and many of their classes are held in the evening - I assume for people who work during the day. I found that at the gym too, the things I was interested in met at 5pm, the height of the rush hour and in the winter it is already dark by then.

    The library in town used to have travel lectures with lots of pictures and they were very enjoyable. I'm glad you are getting out and having fun.