JOAN’S BLOG – WEDNESDAY, APRIL 23, 2008 – THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF AD SPOUSES

I am always gratified to see new readers and Message Board writers here at TheAlzheimerSpouse, as seems to be the case these past few weeks. What continues to amaze me is that although our backgrounds and life experiences are completely different; that we come from every corner of the United States and many from our neighboring Canada; others from countries as far away as Australia – we speak with one voice.

The most frequent comment with which we relate seems to be – “Where is my husband/wife?” “Who are you, and what did you do with my husband/wife?” We all feel the loss of our spouse and the loneliness and grief that accompanies that loss. We have all felt  for, at times, not liking the person who is screaming and raging  at us as Alzheimer’s Disease takes over their brain; we have all felt resentful because we have been involuntarily cast into the “parent” instead of “spouse” role. But most of all, we have felt alone- that we were the only spouse of an AD patient who was experiencing these emotions.

As my regular readers know, and our new members are finding out, just having someone who truly understands, can lift a bit of the burden from our shoulders.

My never-ending gratitude to my two support group friends who let me know that I was not alone, that every emotion I was feeling was common to the AD spouse. If they had not validated my feelings, I often wonder if I would have found the courage to start this website. It was through them that I learned the universality of my emotions as an AD spouse, and it is through this website that I hope you will gain strength and comfort in knowing your emotions are shared by AD spouses everywhere.

Feedback to joan@thealzheimerspouse.com

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