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JOAN’S BLOG – FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 7, 2007 – TRANQUILITY – A MOMENT IN TIME
Sometimes I sense there is mental telepathy among all of us spouses, when you, my readers, express what I have been reflecting upon even before I write about it. I was mulling over the idea of writing a blog on the peace, serenity, and joy we feel when our spouse “comes back” for a time. I checked in on the message boards, and there was a post by one of our readers who said she and her husband had been away at their vacation home for a month – he was like a different person; even called her “honey”, which he hadn’t done in a long time. Another reader answered that we must treasure those times.

We have so often discussed how much AD has changed our spouses; how they are not the person we married; how the change in them has hurt our relationship; how much we miss the spouses we loved. But every once in a while, we are given a gift  (Some of you say it is a curse, because we are teased, and then tormented when it is taken away again) and our lover returns for a day, a week, a month. I do not know why this happens, but every one of my AD spouse friends has reported the same phenomenon.
The tantrums subside, the whining and neediness seem to decrease, and all of sudden, arms reach out to us, and we are embraced by the person we remember – the person we fell in love with long ago. How sweet to have him or her hold you and tell you how much you are loved, how sorry they are that this disease shreds the relationship. How sweet to hold hands, lay your head on their shoulder, engage in a meaningful conversation, maybe even make love again. Treasure every single second of it. The reality of AD is that it may never come again.

If you have had this experience, tell us about it on the message boards - I will label the discussion -When Your Spouse "returns" for a Brief Period of Time

Feedback to joan@thealzheimerspouse.com

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