JOAN’S BLOG – TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 2007 – REFLECTIONS OF LOVE – MY TURN

We both knew on the first date that this was going to be forever. It was as if my heart always had a piece missing. When I found him, I found the piece that made my heart whole . 

We complemented each other – his strengths were my weaknesses, and my strengths were his weaknesses. His business was retail electronics – he could read and understand a technical manual ; he could take apart and put together any piece of electronic equipment; he could program the first VCR; he could read road  maps; follow driving directions; go someplace once and never need directions again; understand math, debits, credits , and do it all quickly. I could do none of those things, but I had talents he lacked. I could use words  and language  to pave the way for any occasion. He put together the TV; I wrote the letter complaining about the service. We were a team; we called our team, “US”. If we had an argument, we would quickly make up, telling each other, “I miss “US”.

AD changed everything. His processing is slow; his comprehension of spoken language is poor – he is so easily confused by what is said; he is no longer able to follow the directions for hooking up electronic equipment; he forgets what was said a minute ago. I have had to pick up the slack, trying to learn to do what used to come so easily to him. I am not always successful.

What AD has not changed is his love and concern for me. Not a day goes by that he does not take me in his arms and tell me how much he loves and appreciates me – how he hurts to see me have to bear the burden of so much. No, he is not the person he was; we do not have the same relationship we had; but through AD education and our support system, we have worked to forge a new relationship. It may be different than the one that came before it, but what is not different is that we will love each other forever. That space in my heart will always be filled by him.   

Tell us your love story – on the message boards or e-mail to me – joan@thealzheimerspouse.com  Pictures are welcome.