JOAN’S WEEKEND BLOG – FEBRUARY 26/27, 2011 – SIMPLIFYING MY LIFE

The batteries on this Energizer Bunny have run out.  I have decided that the only way I am going to survive my husband’s mental decline from Alzheimer’s Disease, physical decline from Diabetes, and my “nonagenarian” (I looked it up – means 90-99 years old) father’s decline into dementia is to simplify my life.

As long as there are no rages to deal with, I have learned to handle what goes on inside the house, no matter how bizarre the non-conversations and repetitive questions. What is wearing me out is the running around. This week was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. At the beginning of the week, I did the Walmart, Sam’s, and Publix shopping, stocking up on what I needed for at least two weeks – or so I thought. This was in between doctor, car maintenance, and haircut appointments.

On one of those days, after an appointment, and two store trips, as I dragged myself into the house, and sat down on the couch, Sid “reminded” me that I had not yet given him the ultrasound bone stimulation treatment for his broken knees. I did not get a chance to respond (which would not have been a pleasant retort), when the phone rang. It was my father telling me that I had to take him to the eye doctor, because both of the nose guards on his glasses fell off and were lost. I told him that there was no way I was taking him to the eye doctor; I would take his GLASSES. Which is exactly what I did, and returned them to him with new nose guards. This time when I walked into the house, I sat down and told Sid that I was not doing another thing all night.  Thank goodness the ALF delivers our supper every night. All he had to do was warm it up.

The next morning the phone rings. It is my father with a list of things he needs. The aides wait until he has run out of the supplies before making up the list for him, so he needed them NOW. He told me there was something else he needed, but could not remember. He called three more times, and each time forgot what it was as soon as I answered the phone. To which my husband said- “I’m glad I’m not that bad yet.” I laughed, and thought to myself – “That’s what you think!”
Off I went to Walmart to buy everything he needed, delivered it to him, and put everything away. I then came home, and you guessed it – the phone rang. He had finished his book, and needed another one. I told him it could wait until tomorrow. I sat down, and Sid said to me – “Beall’s is having a sale on shorts. It’s only today and tomorrow. I need shorts. You’ll have to go tomorrow.”

That is when I snapped. Technology is my friend; it is here to simplify my life, and I am going to use it accordingly. I decided at that moment that I was finished running around, and was going to let the computer handle the situation. There is nothing I need in Walmart or Beall’s that cannot be purchased online and DELIVERED. I do not care that both stores are down the street from me. I already order all of my father’s incontinence supplies and hearing aide batteries online. I will expand my online shopping to include whatever I have been running myself ragged to purchase in stores.
As for food, although our nightly dinner is delivered, it is not usually something I care for, so I have been making chicken or fish with fresh vegetables as an alternative. Then I discovered Lean Cuisine. I do not care if I eat frozen meals every night. It is simple and less work for me. I will check, but I think Publix has a delivery service. If it does, I am going to use it.

The person who delivers our dinner returns to the ALF dining room to work there for the evening meal. Last night, I handed him a bag with a book for my father, and asked him to give it to him. Since he is going to the dining room anyway, and my father is eating in the dining room, it is not an imposition on him. Another simplification for me.

So there you have it. I am going to live through this caregiving journey by simplifying my life and doing what is best for ME. The bunny is tired.

Feedback to joan@thealzheimerspouse.com
©Copyright 2011 Joan Gershman 
The Alzheimer Spouse LLC
2011 All Rights Reserved
Under penalty of copyright laws, this information cannot be copied or posted on any website, media, or print outlet, without referencing the author and website from which it was taken.

The material included on this website contains general information intended as information only. This site is not intended to provide personal, professional, medical, or psychological advice, and should not be relied upon to govern behavior in any certain or particular circumstances. The opinions in the blogs are solely those of the owner of the website. The opinions on the message boards are not necessarily endorsed by the owner of this website, and are the opinions of those persons writing the messages. All material on this web site is for demonstration and informational purposes only.           

The Alzheimer Spouse LLC 2010 All Rights Reserved