JOAN’S BLOG – FRIDAY, JANUARY 8, 2010 – AN ODD RE-CONNECTION

Yesterday I wrote about how one random incident emphasized to me the amount of “disconnect” Alzheimer’s Disease has brought to my relationship with my husband. As is the case with this roller coaster disease, another unexpected incident brought a momentary reconnect.

Throughout our married life, one of my biggest pet peeves was that Sid insisted on having a TV in the kitchen, and watching the news during dinner. I felt that dinner time was for conversation, interaction, and discussing the day’s events. Much to my consternation, I lost that battle, mostly because of his workaholic work schedule, which rarely even allowed him to be home during dinner, and when he was, it was the only time he could catch up on the news. The tradition of a TV in the kitchen followed us right up to the house we just moved from on September 1st. And me still being disgruntled about it.

Our villa does not have a cable connection in the kitchen, and due to the shared walls, one cannot be installed. Oh, how thrilled I was that after 40 years, we could eat dinner over world, daily, and life discussions. Ah, but you know how that turned out. Alzheimer’s Disease and deep, intellectual discussions do not exactly go together. And while we were eating in silence, I was missing the world news broadcast.

I thought to myself – Well, I guess it is time to prove that I have learned something about flexibility. I asked Sid to set up two tray tables in the den, and informed him that we would be eating dinner in front of the TV from now on. Needless to say, he was thrilled. But as we sat there eating dinner, and commenting on the news, the oddest thing happened. I felt a re-connection that I have not felt since the blog of October 07. We were talking and enjoying an activity TOGETHER, however simple it may have been. I was as surprised at that feeling of re-connection as I had been the day before at the realization of loss brought on by my phone conversation with my friend.

I am actually looking forward to dinner on the tray tables in front of the TV again, as it has given us a chance to be “together” and talk. How odd that something so simple could mean so much. But when it’s Alzheimer’s Disease, one is grateful for whatever connection one can get.

Does anyone else have a story of a simple odd re-connection?  I am always wondering if others share my Alzheimer experiences. Please post on Message Board Topic: Joan’s Blog – Odd Re-Connection.

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The Alzheimer Spouse LLC
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