JOAN’S BLOG – THURSDAY, MAY 29, 2008 – FAQ LISTS FOR OUR SPOUSES

I am a contemporary enough woman to have figured out modern technology , either by trial and error or formal courses.  I know how to use many computer applications – Word, excel (sort of), power point (not so much), e-mail, and what I consider my crowning achievement – web design software. I can work a digital camera (not the new one we just bought), put the pictures on the computer, work my new Blackberry (pink, actually) cell phone, and program the microwave .

However, I am just old fashioned enough to like to speak to a HUMAN BEING when I have questions about ANYTHING, whether it be how to place the Google Ads or how to fix a computer glitch. Nothing drives me battier than those unending lists of FAQ’S (Frequently Asked Questions)  on the computer.  I don’t want to read through 10 pages of FAQ’s until I come to mine, and find out that they didn’t answer the question to my satisfaction anyway. So I have come to HATE FAQ lists.

Well, I DO hate them when I have to read through them, but I am beginning to change my tune when it comes to my husband’s constant questions about the SAME subjects day after day after day. When are the prescriptions coming from the mail order pharmacy? (Same day I told you the last 3 times you asked.)  Why didn’t you send the letter to the insurance company? (I already told him 5 days in a row that I DID send the letter.)   Why didn’t you tell me about Joel’s vacation? ( I did – at least 3 times) Where is the .………..Why didn’t you tell me……….Why didn’t you do……….?  Notice a theme here? It’s always MY fault that something didn’t get done, even though it did. He just can’t remember that it did.

So I have decided to capitulate to the FAQ lists and make my own. I am going to place them in a notebook, neatly labeled by category in alphabetical order, as any self-respecting organizational freak such as myself would do. When he asks me the same question for the fourth time on the third day in a row, I will hand him the notebook, smile sweetly, and say – “Check the FAQ’s first.”

I know what the caregiver books say; I know I am supposed to ignore the fact that he asks the same questions incessantly. If he remembered the answer, he wouldn’t ask. I know some spouses who don’t let it bother them at all. I applaud them. I wish I could be like them. I’m not that good natured. I am sort of cranky, I guess.  So I’m going with the FAQ notebook. I wrote a Blog about incessant questions 3 months ago, but never did get to that notebook, but now I’m at my wit’s end, so I am going to do it!

Feedback to joan@thealzheimerspouse.com

The material included on this website contains general information intended as information only. This site is not intended to provide personal, professional, medical, or psychological advice, and should not be relied upon to govern behavior in any certain or particular circumstances. The opinions in the blogs are solely those of the owner of the website. The opinions on the message boards are not necessarily endorsed by the owner of this website, and are the opinions of those persons writing the messages. All material on this web site is for demonstration and informational purposes only.

The Alzheimer Spouse LLC 2009 All Rights Reserved