JOAN’S WEEKEND BLOG – MAY 31/JUNE1, 2008 – DOG DILEMMA – PART II- SOME SERIOUS ISSUES TO CONSIDER

Never did I expect such a big response to yesterday’s Blog about my quandary over getting a dog. Thank you all. As I am writing this, between the Message Boards and e-mails, we are running 82% in favor. (This Floridian counts ALL votes!)

Those in the negative brought up excellent points that we should all consider in relation to our pets and our spouses as their conditions deteriorate. There are three issues that deserve careful consideration.

#1. The forgetfulness – No one will die if your spouse forgets to shut off the light or the TV. There can be tragic consequences, however, as one Message Board writer reported, if your spouse forgets to shut the DOOR. Her dog ran outside and drowned in a creek. Since we live on a canal, that has been a concern of mine.

#2. Violence – There have been many Message Board posts about AD spouses who became physically abusive toward the caregiver spouse. These are men and women who would never have lifted a hand to their spouse before AD. I received an e-mail from a man who told me that his previously mild mannered AD wife started to hit and kick their cat. He had to find another home for the cat.

#3. Responsibility – Although my husband is stable, and could remain stable for years, he could also decline suddenly. AD is unpredictable. With his decline, would come more work and responsibility for his care. Add dog duty responsibilities to it, and I would be even more overburdened.

So you see, I am being level-headed about this – I haven’t run off to a shelter to adopt the first sad looking fur ball I lay my eyes on.  HOWEVER, the unconditional love, companionship, diversion from AD, utter joy of seeing that wagging tail, and blood pressure lowering effects of having a dog, are outweighing the negatives.

The biggest issue that was preventing me from stepping into the dog world again was the “walking” . When we lived in Massachusetts, we had a huge fenced in yard, so we just opened the door and let them out. Here in Florida, we have a small patch of land, unfenced, and everyone walks their dogs on leashes. Since Sid’s diabetic foot condition prevents him from walking far, I thought that was a deal breaker. Then I realized that he doesn’t have to go far at all. There’s a huge section of land between ours and the canal, less than 30 feet from the patio, where he or I could “walk” it for bathroom duty. The beautiful fenced in dog park, which is a 5 minute ride down the road, would serve as an exercise pen, and socialization time for both Sid and the dog.

Of course, if we do get a dog, I will do everything in my power to make sure that it is safe. At this point in our AD journey, Sid is will be fine with the dog. I will make adjustments as necessary as his condition changes.

The next big decision is WHAT KIND OF DOG??  No puppies. I’m finished with raising babies and puppies. I’m looking for a 3-4 year old dog. We have always been BIG DOG people. Obviously, neither one of us can handle a big dog anymore. Golden Retrievers are our dog of choice – we adore them, but they are too big for us now.  So what I want is a non-shedding lap dog with the temperament of a Golden Retriever. Any suggestions???  I am just not that familiar with small breeds. Post your suggestions on the existing Message Board Topic – Should Joan Get a Dog?

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