JOAN’S WEEKEND BLOG – OCTOBER 8/9, 2010 – BODY AND MIND

I remember a man six years older than me. He was taller, bigger, stronger, and faster than I could ever be. He lifted TV’s, fence sections, and 50 lb. boxes. He hauled suitcases that I packed, meaning they were heavier than a small adult. He opened jars for me with his huge, strong hands. He walked so much faster than me that when we walked the outdoor track together, I let him go on ahead. I was never going to catch up. When we went to the gym together, he lifted weights 3 times heavier than I did.
This morning, I opened a jar of juice for him. His hands were too weak to turn the cap. As if watching Alzheimer’s Disease disintegrate has mind has not been sorrowful enough, I am now watching Diabetes and arthritis destroy his body.

When our spouse’s mind is being destroyed, but the body is strong and healthy, we lament that the Alzheimer suffering could drag on for 20 years, and pray for a quicker, more peaceful end. But watching the body crumble is also heartbreaking. And more so for him, because unlike many of his Alzheimer’s symptoms to which he is clueless, he is fully aware of his body betraying him. How humiliating, frustrating, and devastating it is for him to face; that man I remember who was so strong.

There is nothing that can be done for Alzheimer’s Disease. He will continue to take the Aricept and Namenda. He will continue as long as possible to enjoy his social activities. But inevitably, Alzheimer’s Disease will march on and win. It always does.

There is, however, treatments for his physical ailments. He has more and varied physical therapy than anyone I know of any age. Because the therapists are on site at our Independent Living Villas, they are always here, either providing therapy, checking up on him, helping him, being in contact with the doctors. He receives therapy to strengthen his leg muscles because of the 4 months of sitting waiting for the broken foot to heal. He receives therapy for his arthritic back; therapy for his knees, which also became weak and painful from all of that sitting.

However, his AD prevents him from remembering anything the therapists tell him. I have to be with him constantly to remind him how to walk, how to stand, when to walk, and what to do to alleviate his pain. We have an appointment for more back injections, but he forgets that we do.

He used to have a high tolerance for pain, but last night, he was in more pain than I have ever seen him. He said he did not know how much longer he could stand it. His back, knees, and shoulders were torturing him. I felt helpless and sick at heart. I can do nothing for his head; I am doing everything I can for his body. None of it seems to be enough, as I watch my once strong, healthy husband fall apart before my eyes.

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